


Fighting Chance

by DGCatAniSiri



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Episode: s03e15 Yesterday's Enterprise, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-02
Updated: 2017-03-02
Packaged: 2018-09-27 19:29:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10042220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DGCatAniSiri/pseuds/DGCatAniSiri
Summary: Tasha discusses her decision to return with the Enterprise-C with her closest friend on the Enterprise-D.





	

Tasha had never liked Sickbay. Hospitals and medical wards in general. On Turkana IV, ‘doctors’ were just drug dealers by another name. As a girl, she’d sworn to stay away from them, after having to help wean her sister of the same drug that had led their mother and father to join up with one of the roving gangs on the planet, and gotten them killed. 

And then she’d been saved by Starfleet, leaving her sister behind – not by choice, but the Starfleet officers who’d rescued her had been forced to do so, or be killed by the Alliance. Or the Coalition. Tasha had never been able to keep the lines of distinction between the two straight. Nor had she cared. Ishara had joined the Coalition, refusing to go with her, and she’d had to just leave her sister behind, writing her off as dead – the alternative was to always wonder what had become of a sister she’d never see again. Starfleet had saved her, at least. And, especially with the talk of the war with the Klingons, joining them was the way to help repay that debt.

Still, Tasha had never fully overcome that ingrained distrust of doctors, that initial burst of fear she suffered when walking in that someone was going to shoot her up with dream dust or something worse.

But she needed to talk some things out with someone she trusted. There really was no one else on the Enterprise that Tasha felt comfortable speaking to than Beverly. They’d worked together for several years, and, despite her feelings towards doctors, there were few on the ship who she trusted more to help her with the conflicting thoughts in her head.

As was to be expected given the situation, Sickbay was bustling with activity. The medical staff had released all of the critically wounded _Enterprise-C_ crew, but they were preparing for a fight with the Klingons. Tasha knew the crew, trusted Captain Picard, wanted to believe that the Federation could still win this fight. Still, she was the tactical officer of the ship, and she received the same reports the Captain did. She knew that the Federation’s chances were dwindling. 

There was a reason that Captain Picard hadn’t argued much with Captain Garrett about her and her crew returning to the past. Another ship joining the war effort today would just prolong the battle. That same ship going back in time to Narendra III could prevent the war in its entirety. 

Tasha caught Beverly’s eye as she was issuing commands to the medical teams. Beverly nodded, motioning to her office, indicating she’d join Tasha once she’d handed off assignments. 

It took a minute or two before Beverly got away. “Sorry about that, Tasha.”

“I understand, Beverly.” More than once, Tasha had been pressed for time as she issued orders, and even the captain had sometimes had to wait for her to finish. Tasha understood being on the opposite end of it. 

Beverly took a seat across from her. “What can I do for you?”

“I... suppose I needed to talk for a bit. About the _Enterprise-C_.”

“No surprise there. That’s the topic on everyone’s mind. Sometimes I wonder if we shouldn’t have proper therapists on these warships, even considering the fact that by this point, we all have traumatic stress disorders...” Beverly shook her head. “Anything specific about it?”

Now, they were entering into an awkward area – much of the data and information that Tasha had received about the war that were classified beyond Beverly’s clearance level. Still, she would make the attempt – she needed to talk to someone, and, as she’d just said, there weren’t therapists assigned to warships like the _Enterprise_. 

“I... suppose I was thinking about the fight we’ll be sending the _Enterprise-C_ into. How they’re sure to be destroyed.”

The doctor made a face. “Patching up these people just to send them to a doomed fight... A part of me wants to protest sending them back. But I trust Captain Picard’s judgment. If he thinks the _Enterprise-C_ is better suited going back... I’ll have to go along with that.” Beverly’s lack of appreciation for the idea was plainly visible, as well as her desire to push for an alternative, but she was a Starfleet officer, trained well to hold her tongue about missions and orders she didn’t like. 

“It’s more than that... Beverly... I wonder if I could do more for the _Enterprise-C_ than just offering them new tactics or strategies.”

“Unfortunately, based on some of the things Commander La Forge I don’t know if there is anything that anyone can do, unless we went back with them.” There was a pause as Beverly realized what was really on Tasha’s mind. “Tasha, you can’t go back with them!”

“Why not? I can do more good with them than I can here, in our time. Commander Riker is just as capable of manning the tactical board as I am, the _Enterprise-D_ would get along without me. On the _Enterprise-C_ , I can buy them valuable time. We have schematics of the warbirds the Romulans were using at the time, schematics I’ve seen and I know. I could do them more good.”

To Tasha’s lack of surprise, Beverly shook her head, intending to argue. “Tasha, you’d be a woman out of time. If by some miracle, the _Enterprise-C_ could survive, you’d be twenty years out of place. You wouldn’t belong there.” She hesitated a moment, then continued. “And the likeliest outcome is that you’d die along with them. The _Enterprise-C_... is not likely to come back from this.”

Tasha nodded. “I’m aware. Doctor... Beverly... I joined Starfleet so that I could make a difference. That when it mattered for Starfleet, I’d be there. After they saved me from the colony, I wanted to do what I could to help Starfleet. This war, though... I don’t feel that what I’m doing fighting it is making that difference. One additional officer, no matter where she serves, isn’t going to win this war for us. But the _Enterprise-C_... Her mission will make a difference. Every hand available will make a difference.”

Now, Beverly fixed her with a pointed look. “If that’s what you believe, Tasha, why aren’t you encouraging every crewman on this _Enterprise_ to go back to the _Enterprise-C_? Or have us follow them through that anomaly out there and defend Narendra III alongside them?”

“You mean besides the Temporal Prime Directive?” Tasha asked, this time with a bitter laugh. She was positive that there were likely a handful of truly desperate Federation scientists and Starfleet officers probably making an attempt as they spoke to engage in some form of time travel and prevent this war from happening – the Temporal Prime Directive only ever seemed to be brought up right before the damn thing was violated to hell and back. “I’m not saying we should all abandon our posts and go with the _Enterprise-C_. But Beverly... Making a difference, taking a stand against senseless brutality against even our enemies, protecting innocent lives... That’s why I joined Starfleet. And I’m sure our mission is going to put us in the position to continue doing that, but... I know my involvement in going back with the _Enterprise-C_ would make a difference for them. Maybe only that they manage to survive for five minutes instead of five seconds, but maybe those five seconds mean the difference between life and death for some Klingon who paves the way for peace between the Empire and the Federation, rather than this stupid war we’re all fighting for no good reason. Isn’t that enough? There’s meaning in that, even if no one else knows who was responsible for them having that chance.”

For a long moment, Beverly was quiet, as if she was thinking of arguments against what Tasha was saying and discarding them one by one. “If you feel so strongly about this, then why come to me? Why not take your case straight to Captain Picard?”

“I guess I... wanted a professional opinion as to whether I had completely lost my mind. I know that it sounds crazy, suggesting that I go ahead and transfer to a ship that is going to sacrifice itself.”

“On the basis of that, yes, I’d probably say you’re crazy. But then, that’s a charge I could levy at everyone who signs on for duty on a warship like this.” Beverly sighed, giving Tasha’s words consideration, weighing them against her own beliefs. “You sound sane and reasonable to me, Tasha. I don’t particularly like it, but you make a good argument.” She paused for a moment, shaking her head in disapproval. “As I said, I don’t particularly like it, I’ll admit, but I’m a doctor. My job is to save lives. You’re talking about sacrificing yourself. Still... As much as I don’t like it, if ever there was a time when I could be swayed to believe in the concept of ‘acceptable casualties,’ we’re certainly approaching that point.”

Her words made Tasha realize that, even if Beverly wasn’t cleared for the reports, she had to know the way the wind was blowing. Too many people left Sickbay on stretchers, headed for the morgue. If tactical officers were the first to realize that the war was a losing fight, doctors were a very close second. 

“If the _Enterprise-C_ is successful, just in going back there, not even in stopping the attack, then this war may never happen. All those people you’ve struggled to patch up after the Klingons have fought us... They’ll never have died. Against that possibility, even the chance to do that... It’s really not even a question to me.”

Realizing that there was no way to talk her friend out of this, Beverly nodded, giving Tasha a sad smile. “I know.” She sighed. “You still need to convince the captain, of course. But... If you tell him what you’ve told me, I don’t see how he could argue with you.”

Tasha took Beverly’s hand, summoning a thin smile. “I... Beverly, your friendship has meant so much to me over the last four years. You’ve shown me that kindness and compassion can exist, even in the darkest of times. I... I wanted to make sure you knew that, before... before anything else happened.”

Whatever came next, Tasha knew that anything she didn’t say now, she never would. And saying goodbye to her home, her family, was painful in a way that leaving Turkana had never been.

Giving her life for others to live, for even the chance to live, however, was no difficult decision for Tasha Yar.

**Author's Note:**

> I was watching "Yesterday's Enterprise" recently, and wondered what would have happened if Guinan hadn't been there to tell Tasha she didn't belong there. In writing this up, honestly a part of me came to like this version better, because it's all on Tasha's shoulders - she's not going back to 'correct' a 'meaningless death' (a concept I honestly take issue with, as Tasha died the same way many emergency service workers go, taking on a risk that could be deadly in the name of helping others), she is going for the chance to make a difference. I also wanted some interaction between Beverly and Tasha, as in canon, I don't think they actually HAD a scene together.
> 
> But you tell me which version you prefer!


End file.
